So tired D:
But I wanna write or read or something…. D:
vegetaangst asked: After you receive this, it's asked that you please share 5 random facts about yourself, and pass it on to 5 of your favourite followers!
Sorry for the late reply on this U_U;
1) The only class I’ve been close to failing is Reading in, like, middle school. It’s not that I didn’t read (I did almost constantly/obsessively), but they wanted us to fill out time sheets and I’m really really bad about those. Like super bad. Getting things signed and turned in was, like, my bane throughout my gradeschool years (except for that one year where my dad worked actually in my school as a teacher).
2) I will go far out of my way for Jamba Juice. The most painful thing is looking up locations for them and there’s one like 5 minutes from my apartment but it’s inside the airport. IT’S SO CLOOOSEEE AND YET SO FAAAR.. D:
3) I used to have my Coke-Cola habit under control. I do not any more. I blame work and access to free unlimited Coke.
4) I played Terraria (similar to Minecraft except 2D and a bit more focus on fighting) and I had to force myself to stop because I stopped eating in favor of playing the game. I once did that for about 48 hrs straight and about the time that I realized I had a problem.
5) I’m super bad at reading people and so I tend to take what everyone says at face value. I think it makes me a happier person, but it’s caused some mild amount of issues in the past. But it does mean that I can be pretty gullible..
Fuuuuuuuuuck. Is FF.net running super slow for anyone else right now. Because it’s taking, like, five minutes ever time I press next.
Anonymous asked: I was wondering what the best way to go about finding a dom is. I'm new to the community and I'm 18.
This is the most frequently asked question I receive on tumblr and one of the most alarming. You’re new to BDSM and only 18 so one would have to assume you’re a novice with little or no experience (or you would know the answer to the question already).
I could respond with “try fetlife or collar me”, but one would, again, have to assume you have no idea what they are?
Let me ask you some questions? What is SSC v RACK? What are your hard limits? What are your guidelines with regards to a scene? Whats the difference between humiliation, depersonalization and degradation? Have you used a vampire glove before? Tell me about your realistic expectations you need from a Dominant and the relationship? How do you know if a Dom is the right Dom for you? What are the ‘red flag’ warnings of a fake/predator Dom? Are you a switch? Does ‘shibari’ interest you? Have you used a ‘sybian’ in the past? Are there any local munches you could attend? Do you know what ‘BDSM’ means? How do you personally identify as a submissive? Define your protocols regarding discipline and behaviour correction.
BDSM is a lifestyle that needs to be understood and learned. Any novice who identifies as submissive should begin to read, read and read some more and see what appeals to you and what interests you. Learn about all aspects and flavors of kink, fetish and the D/s lifestyle. How can you set limits, protocol or know what you want from D/s if you don’t know what you’re entering into?
I recommend all new submissives to read through this:
The novice submissive (Original source: bdsmdebunkingthemyths.com)
There’s a collection of resourses HERE with many essays. etc and I’ll provide some useful links for you to start with:
D/s help and info for newbies (Source: wizdomme.com)
BDSM Safety (Source: bdsmcaffe.com)
BDSM general guidelines (Source: missdi.co.za)
How To Spot A Non Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 1 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
Run Don’t Walk: Warning Signs of A Predator Dom/me Part 2 (Source: submissiveguide.com)
Red Flags, Warning Signs, and Intuition: Learning to Trust You Instincts - Part One: Dominants (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
What Makes A Good Dominant (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)
What Should A Dominant Be (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
Qualities of a successful Dominant (Source: the-iron-gate.com)
10 Considerations For Inexperienced Subs (Source: fortheloveofasub.tumblr.com)
Introduction To Submission (Source: Kim Debron / kimdebron.tripod.com)
Ten Tips For The Novice, Heterosexual submissive Woman (Source: Jay Wiseman / the-iron-gate.com)
There are many more essays and help/advice links to be found:
Library For Kinksters (Source: dominantlife.tumblr.com)
Please take the time to read through these and educate yourself before entering into a relationship. Knowledge with help keep you safe, give you confidence and BDSM will be less intimidating. You’ll have all the answers you need.
There are also a selection of books on BDSM:
BDSM: The Naked Truth by Dr Charley Ferrer
Dear Raven and Joshua: Questions and Answers About Master/Slave Relationships by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera
Devil in the Details I: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - The Master, The Slave, The Power by LT Morrison
Devil in the Details II: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Mastery Refine: The Issues, The Skills by LT Morrison
Devil in the Details III: The Art of Mastery, A Mentoring Trilogy - Sustainable Structure and Traning by LT Morrison
Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission by William Brame, Gloria Brame and Jon Jacobs
Living M/s: A Book for Masters, slaves and Their Relationships by Dan and Dawn Williams
Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice by Robert Rubel
Master/slave Relations: Communications 401 by Robert Rubel
Master/slave Relations: Solutions 402, Living in Harmony by Robert Rubel
Protocols: A Variety of Views by Robert Rubel
Real Service by Joshua Tenpenny and Raven Kaldera
Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism by Phillp Miller and Molly Devon
SM101: A Realistic Introduction by Jay Wiseman
The Control Book by Peter Masters
The Loving Dominant by John and Libby Warren
The New Bottoming Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.
The New Topping Book by Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy.
The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge by Tristan Taormino
This Curious Human Phenomenon: An Exploration of Some Uncommonly Explored Aspects of BDSM by Peter Masters
Where I Am Led: A Service Exploration Workbook by Christina Parker
There’s an essay I recently wrote with information/help on finding a D/s partner below, but I would urge you to be patient and wait until you have the confidence, knowledge and understanding behind you before you begin your search
For ALL novice submissive, please… do the study before taking the test. For your own safety and wellbeing. I recieve too many messages from inexperienced subs who are taken advantage of and abused by unscrupulous ‘so-called’ dominants. Stay safe.
For those who want a plethora of information.
Don’t be overwhelmed. There is of course a large amount of info on the scene, but most of it can be summed up in using common sense.
For those that want more details though, this is a great list.
For those who just want a little rough sex from their partner, to use a blindfold sometimes, or want to be pinned up against a wall, don’t stress just confess.
One final thing, if your 18 and looking for a partner, it doesn’t have to be a Dom. It could be some cute person you already know. Get to know them and bring up kinks in conversation. you may be able to explore and grow together.
Anonymous asked: Hiya! I play a blind character in an rp, and really want to capture the essence of how he feels about it (blind since birth) Do you have any reccomendations or perhaps a link or two?
Build them up as a character first. What’s their personality? Temperament? Likes and dislikes? Talents? How do they handle stress? Do they get discouraged easily? Are they outgoing? Establish their relationships with others, too. Do they have a lot of friends? Do they get a lot of support? You need all this (i.e. a developed character) to establish how they would feel about blindness. And now some links:
- ”[…] development of a character who is blind, deaf, or mute and wasn’t born that way” - clevergirlhelps
- ”[…] Not only how they live, what kind of jobs they can have, but how that would effect their personalities?” - fuckyeahcharacterdevelopment
- A Guide on: How to write a blind character - ivvrite
- How to: Play a Blind Character - rpcgron
- Blind Characters: A Process of Awareness - thewritersarchive
- "I was just asking how would I describe things in a perspective of a blind person?" - referenceforwriters
- "I was wondering if you have any tips for roleplaying as a blind character! Also, how would I portray someone blind having sex?" - rpedia
- "Please can give me any advice / resources on how to write from the perspective of a blind character?" - thewritingcafe
- ”[…] I’m having a bit of trouble figuring out how to describe what they feel, how they behave, etc.” - writinghelpers
- /tagged/character building
- Personal Stories - visionaware.org
- A Blind Man’s Vision of Blindness - worldaccessfortheblind.org
- Growing Up Blind (youtube) - TommyEdisonXP
- How Do Blind People Picture Reality? - livescience.com (has personal account)
- Blindness—What it Means in the Mind of a Blind Child - nfb.org (has personal account)
- Living Blind - livingblind.com
- Living with Vision Loss - nlm.nih.gov
- Living with Vision Loss - afb.org
- Living with Someone Who is Blind or Visually Impaired - voices.yahoo.com
- Orientation and Mobility - cs.unc.edu
- Learning About Blindness - afb.org
- Blindness Resources - nfbmd.org
- "Do blind people see in their dreams? Do they see in color?" - afb.org
- The mind’s eye can learn to see, even in those blind since birth - articles.latimes.com
- People blind from birth use visual brain area to improve other senses: Can hear and feel with greater acuity - sciencedaily.com
- The Part of the Brain that Processes Visual Text May Not Require Vision After All - visionaware.org
- Two for Blindness and Neuroscience - visionaware.org
- Learning Braille - nationalbrailleweek.org
- How Guide Dogs Work - howstuffworks.com
Hope that helped!